so tidy and neat, life away is cleaned...

- U r so lousy and sloppy! Ever gonna be nothing! Could u just restrain that imagination a bit!!! Keep some facts about! And u can't even write!  Well, one can do a lot of things with words - one can crush others or caress them - it is a choise we make every time we use words. Like hands: u can fondle or punch. One word leads to another and the result might come to mind still decades later either killing or lifting. It's truly amazing!

And I do know people who are perfectly tidy and competent, considering every word and never making mistakes! They have no penalties or such, but they'll have a large pension someday... They are bloody smug and stale!!

I knew once  - or knew and knew - met and talked anyway - one Nicolas. He was 80 yrs old and really strict, had always been. And somehow it just had happened so  that in all those yrs he had not once kissed a woman, not once anyone!!! I did not ask about men because he'd had an heartattack. But think about that: what is it like, life, 80 yrs never touching anyone??? And he's not the only one... by the way i know one teacher 55 yrs, an uncommonly pathetic figure in  a similar situation.And there are women, too.  It is a vicious circle: u want to have a romantic and carnal relationship with someone, but each time u think to touch u feel it, sin and dirty!!! It just is so sick, touching...

Why the fuck do we have a life??? For such showing-off minx? No way I'll consent!!! And it aint any climax of developement! No, it's just fruitless delirium and death. Zombielife... What is better in life than to taste someones bacterial growth with tongue deep in throat or sniffing the aroma of pubic hairs? Each with their style but quite useless to try to confine me to fucking dots!!!